Moving Back Home after Graduation: How to Survive

AFS Team·9 July 2018·6 min read
Moving Back Home after Graduation: How to Survive
By Elizabeth Whittingham

If you’re planning on moving back home after graduation and are not really sure how you are going to cope, then check out our ultimate guide on how to survive home life after three years of getting up at noon and making pasta at 4am.

Discuss the logistics before you move back in

Make sure that you discuss the logistics with your family before you move back in. Work out where you are going to sleep and try not to be too disheartened to learn that a younger sibling has claimed your old bedroom for themselves.

Work out how long you are going to be staying with your parents in order to set a limit on your time there, this is by no means to stress you out, it’s simply something to work towards as many graduates can find moving back in with the parents a stressful and confusing time and therefore having an aim to work towards will usually help to quell any feelings of isolation or loss. Obviously, if you believe that this would not personally work for you then don’t implement one.

Either way, your parents will probably want to know that you have a reasonable plan so it’s always best to have one to help to reassure them!

Pitch in and make an effort

If your parents don’t ask for any rent from you then you are basically living there free of charge so it’s only polite to give something back in return.

It’s the little things that really do matter.

Make dinner for everyone once a week if you’re feeling like a top chef; volunteer to do the food shop occasionally if your parents are still footing the bill entirely and help to hang the laundry out or empty the dishwasher as often as you can in the week to ensure that you keep the house nice and tidy.

Even just picking up some milk and bread on your way back home to restock the fridge will be greatly appreciated by your family and is super simple to do as well!

Discuss your boundaries and privacy

Your parents are going to nag and niggle at you; it’s just all part of the moving back home after university process and is definitely something that every graduate will experience.

Although we do get a lot of support whilst living at home, we also get a great deal of opinions and after three years of making your own decisions with few people around you to comment on them and give their judgement, having your parents comment on the slightest thing can be a trifle frustrating.

Questions along the topic of employment will often pop up, so it’s important to remember what you have achieved so far and to remain confident in what you are still yet to do- if you are actively seeking and applying for jobs then you have nothing to be embarrassed about when family and friends question you.

In terms of privacy, three years in your own space can make returning to your family home an interesting and at times rather invasive experience.

Sometimes, all that is necessary is to tell your parents to knock before entering your bedroom, just to establish some personal space and boundaries.

When setting your own limits, it is only right to ask what your parents would like of you in return; do you need permission to invite friends over? Are you responsible for any expenses? Do you have a curfew? Can you paint your old room? Do you need to pay for internet?

It’s important to be as transparent as is humanly possible during the whole process to make sure that you and your parents are happy with the set up to avoid any awkwardness about bills and food later!

Set aside time for them

We understand, you’re an adult now with your own friends and interests, despite this, it’s natural for your parents to have missed you during your studies.

You’ve been at university for the past three to four years, only seeing your family on rare occasions, so if you’re back home for a while then set aside some time to spend with them, from days out through to cooking them meals and sitting down in the evening to watch some television with them. You could even go for a meal with them or organise something fun to do as a family!

Clean up after yourself

I’m pretty sure that there is nothing more satisfying as a parent than coming back to a clean and tidy house.

So, if you’re parents are working in the day then take some time to clean up after yourself to make sure that the house is tidy and clean for your parent’s return, they’ll definitely appreciate it!

Cleaning and tidying for your parents is a great way to show your appreciation and gratitude towards them and can go a long way in keeping any house tensions to a minimum.

Remind yourself of the old house rules

Although you are most definitely an adult, your parents will probably still see you as a kid, so, keep in mind that they won’t really appreciate being woken up at 4am when you come through the door to enjoy your takeaway and whack on the television.

Likewise for partying, simply view your parents as flatmates and ask yourself whether they would really appreciate being woken up half way through the night to you having a party in the lounge down stairs…

Finally, try not to be too self-conscience about it!

Thousands of graduates move back to their parent’s house after university until they can find their feet and thousands succeed in moving out shortly after.

Treat the experience as a detox, a time to see loved ones and a period to assess and weigh up your endless options and next steps to take in your career.