The 12 types of people you find in a club

Holly Smith·1 February 2017·5 min read
The 12 types of people you find in a club

It’s Friday night, it’s been a long week but you’re ready to get together with your mates and drink a lot of alcohol. However, no matter where you go in the world, you will always find the same types of people in a nightclub. You think by going to Ibiza you’ll get rid of the overly friendly middle-aged man that seems to cling on to you? Think again.

1) The girl on the pull

There is no way this girl is going home alone tonight. Expect exotic dance moves, getting with any guy that so much as looks at her and is probably wearing something very revealing. But who are we to judge? She looks like she’s having fun.

2) The smooth operator:

This guy has the chat. He’s got the moves and is trying to seduce every girl in the club. This usually comes in the form of overly-friendly dance moves where you end up mouthing to your friends that you need desperate help to get away from him.

3) The couple that needs to get a room:

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You can’t quite work out whether they’ve just met or they are in an over passionate long-term relationship. You become concerned for their breathing as neither have come up for air since you’ve been staring at them.

4) The photo bomber:

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You and your friends have all put extra effort into looking good tonight so when the photographer comes by you grab him. It’s not till the next day you find the photo online and see someone pulling a hideous face behind you, making the photo completely unusable on Instagram, cheers mate.

5) The one that’s drunk too much:

They started drinking at 5, so by the time you get to the club they have run for the nearest toilet to be sick and you haven’t seen them in hours. They usually end up calling you so you can hold their hair back or carry them out of the club passed out.

6) The keen Snapchat user:

You’re constantly being dragged into shot with them and they film every drop in the music. You didn’t even need to go on this night out, you could have stayed in and watched it on Snapchat in bed.

7) The sober one:

They’ve got a lecture early the next morning but couldn’t bare to miss the night out so they’ve come out without drinking anything, judging your poor decisions and drunken behaviour.

8) The one that goes for a cigarette every 20 minutes:

Every time you turn round this person has disappeared to the smoking area for yet another cigarette, was there any point them paying to get in?

9) The wild dancer:

You’re not sure where they got their dance moves from but they’re definitely unique. Other clubbers are eyeing them up and you move further away so you’re not associated with them.

10) The person who is rich for the night:

The same person that was moaning how into their overdraft they were, is now offering to buy half the club a drink. Their contactless card is being passed around and it’s not till the next morning they realise they are bankrupt.

11) The bar pusher:

The queue to get a drink at the bar is taking forever, but that doesn’t deter some people. An annoying person is pushing their way to the front regardless of the abuse they’re getting shouted at them.

12) The one that never gets in:

They can’t act sober for the life of them, the bouncer always denies them entry and they end up walking home alone in the cold. Even if they do get in they end up being kicked out for being too drunk and falling over on the dance floor.

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